Even Less Bizarro Social Networking to Scare Off Your Friends!
In our last exciting installment, I ran out the door promising the reason behind all! the! exclamation! marks! when! Bizarro! speaks!
In part, this is my attempt to ape the speech patterns of old comic books and, traditionally, the older books used exclamation marks to end almost every sentence. The theory is that the plain old period “.” would often get overlooked in the inferior printing processes back in the good ol’ days and you would wind up with a bunch of run on sentences. For any of you interested in more on this, take a look here.
Another reason that I’m using them so prevalently is that many folks that follow bizarro social networking rules are the same type that get overly excited and use exclamation marks to end sentences. So consider it my attempt at being subtle. The irony of the situation is that I tend to use exclamation marks in everyday emails and I find it difficult to not use them when posting to LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook, blogs, you name it.
The last reason that I’m using them is … it’s a lot of fun to use exclamation marks! Try it – you may like it!
Moving along …
Bizarro Social Networking
(a.k.a. Me am a Smart Networker!)
Bizarro Social Networking Rule #4: Grrrr! Promote aggressively!
People want to hear about you and your products and your services at all times! Never hesitate or miss an opportunity to bring them up! Start new discussions about your awesome stuff every day!
People won’t get tired of this or think you are shameless! People will line up to speak with you and buy your services!
Non-bizarro behavior: The best way to build a reputation is by adding value to individual conversations and groups. People will seek you out if they know, like and trust you. Certainly, door-to-door salesman get their message out by interrupting people. They also get a lot of doors slammed in their face.
Bizarro Social Networking Rule #5: Like your own posts!
Always make sure people know that you like your own products and services and comments and posts! Always remember the basis of Rule #2 (insult other people, other companies, their products and their services)! People are dumb!
They won’t know that you like your own stuff unless you tell them! You must like your own posts to make sure they know! Dumb dumb dumb people!
Non-bizarro behavior: One would have to ask the question: if you didn’t like something, why would you post it? And if you are posting something that you disagree with … wouldn’t you make your position clear in the initial post comments? I look at it like patting yourself on the back after doing something decent. There’s a good chance that you will put off even your most ardent followers with this behavior.
My parole officer (it’s a long story …) just told me that I’m over my word count for this post so that’s it for today.
Forget to not come back and check for new Bizarro Social Networking tips soon! Special bonus next time: you won’t learn what the bizarro opposite of a globe is!